Tell A Friend Sponsored by Sutter Health

Your Turn: Advice for the Road

View > All Articles
Your Turn: Advice for the Road
By: A Tale of Two Mommies

Topics: advice for moms from moms, parenting advice
Posted by TaleTwoMommies Thu Jun 4, 2009 08:29:32 PDT
Viewed 209 times
0 responses 0 comments

Jen (Dual-career mom of Jacob 6, Caleb 3, and Abigail 11 weeks): Motherhood can be a truly daunting task. Each day brings new challenges - many you thought you’d never have to encounter.

 

Kelli (Stay-at-home mom of Logan 9, and Whitney 8): You know, I prefer to think of challenges as opportunities in disguise.  There is one comforting aspect to these opportunities.

 

Jen: And that would be?

 

Kelli: The fact that most of these situations have already been encountered by other mothers.

 

Jen: That’s right! Thank goodness for those BTDT moms (Been There Done That).

 

Kelli: So before we depart, let’s share some advice from some of our fellow moms:

 

Moms on Balancing Work and Family:

 

Wendy, (DCM Mom to Eva, 5, and Dominic, 4): My best advice on motherhood came from my own mom (of course!!) when she told me to stop working so much and start bonding with my newborn daughter. She told me to figure it out and to be a mother first and an employee second.

 

Molly, (DCM Mom to Jack, 3, and Cate, 1): Make organization a priority – especially for those working moms out there.  With motherhood, career, marriage and everything else, it’s important to minimize the chaos and the best way to do that is to be organized. Plan ahead, make lists and prioritize things as best you can.  Life with kids is supposed to be a joy, so it’s important to take steps to make sure you have the time to enjoy your family. 

 

Jacqueline, (DCM Mom to Hosanna, 15, and Sophie, 13):  When taking important business calls while working-from-home with young children, keep a bowl full of M&Ms by the phone and toss them one at a time. Caught M&Ms get eaten, dropped ones go in the dust bin, mom gets precious minutes of focused, silent attention by the kids (and skip dessert later).

 

 

Moms on Parenting Young Children:

 

Lisa, (DCM to Ian, 14, Grace, 9, and David, 7): "Don't wish your life away." Meaning, don't wish and wait for the next milestone, event, birthday, etc… Appreciate the NOW and live today to the fullest. I have tried to apply this to raising my 3 children.  Instead of always wishing for the next milestone for the children (sleeping through the night, no more toddler tantrums, starting school, no more diapers, etc...)  I try to live for today and appreciate the stage they are in today.

 

Maggie, (SAHM to Curtis, 5, and Maria, 3): Don’t feel guilty over not being able to be all things to all people at all times. What we really should be focusing on is being the best we can be and learning from our children.

 

Lorraine, (DCM to Nick, 26, Andrew, 23, Anthony, 18): Always say I love you, or at least some kind word before you leave home. Children grow up far too quickly. Enjoy each and every moment, even the crying, kicking, screaming, no-no moments.

 

Nicole, (DCM to Nick, 14, Elle, 11, Jack, 8, and Charlie, 5):  Pick your battles. I make the boys always wear a collared shirt when we go out to occasions. Makes the fight null and void! Family rule!!

 

Cathleen, (DCM to Jen, 33, Michelle, 32,  Ryan, 27, Chris, 24): Drive carpool and drive on field trips. You hear a lot of stuff at school that you otherwise wouldn’t have heard!

 

Lisa, (DCM to Coleman, 6): Forget perfection, learn to enjoy the chaos, embrace the mess and find amusement in the imperfect!  You and your child will be much happier.  Don't slack, however, on things related to character.  Will it matter later in life that your child would leave a trail of clothes around the house or liked to jump in mud puddles? NO! But, will it matter later in life that your child did not learn to treat others with kindness and respect? YES!

 

Gretchen, (DCM to adult children David, Mark, and Brian):  Our children knew their friends were always welcome in our home. That way we could keep an eye on their activities as well as monitor the friends they spent time with.  The added bonus for us was knowing their friends as well. Staying involved with children’s activities whether it be scouting, sports, school, etc. also helped when different issues arose. There is a fine line, however, between being involved and allowing a child enough rope to grow and bloom.

 

Moms on Taking Time for Yourself:

Laura, (Part time nurse, full time Mom to Katherine, 6, Luke and Allie, 3, and twice a week a ballet dancer): Find something you are passionate about doing and start today.  Don't wait for life to get less hectic or less busy.  We all know it never will.  You will be a better mom by feeding your own soul.

Shelley, (DCM to Nicki, 18, Gigi, 16, and Nate, 10):  Get an exercise routine! I had 2 in diapers at one point and thought I would go CRAZY at times.  In order to stay ahead of my stress and stay sane and have some ME time, I made sure to work out almost EVERY day. My kids went to the gym daycare and had a fun time playing with other kids while I sweated out my stress AND kept myself in shape!

 

Julie, (SAHM to Jack, 6, Michael, 4, Ryan, 6 mos): Don't forget to actually enjoy your kids. There will always be laundry and dishes. Their childhood is short. You have limited time to play Power Rangers or build tent cities in the living room. Take time to recharge your own batteries. Going to a movie by myself, and not having to share my popcorn is a little piece of heaven. And I come back a better mom and wife!
 
It's great that as women, wives and mothers we can choose to do it all. But I don't recommend it. 

 

Moms on Trusting Instincts:

 

Joanne, (SAHM to Danielle, 9, Natalie, 9, Catherine, 7, and Michael, 4): The best advice I ever received was when our twins were in the NICU for 3 months. It doesn't apply to all, but for any mom who struggles with kids who are frequently sick or who have chronic things like asthma, speech issues, etc. it has always stuck with me.

 1st: "You are your child’s best advocate."   

 2nd:  "Trust your gut.  Moms tend to know 24hrs. before that something may be wrong with their child." 

 

Joanie, (DCM to adult children Laura, Chris, and Robbie): Trust your own instincts! Mothers are born with them, don't be afraid to trust them.



Kelli Wheeler is a Sacramento stay-at-home mom of two whose best advice is to enjoy the journey.

 

Jen Hall is a Sacramento dual-career mom of three who has learned an afternoon spent watching cloud shapes with her three young children is time well-spent.

Send to a Friend
Report a Violation

Log In