SacMomsClub.com

A common lament of both working and stay-at-home moms is the occasional feeling of being trapped.  For working moms, this is usually related to the need for a paycheck – feeling like there is no choice but to continue in the current job situation.  For at-home moms, “trapped” has more to do with the constant demands of being a round-the-clock parent, and having to live by someone else’s schedule and needs.  For other women, a marriage or relationship may make them feel trapped.  In any case, no one wants to feel this way, and if you’re experience this in some part of your own life, it can be an important issue to address.

So what do you do when you find yourself feeling trapped?  There are a few ways you can address the situation.

First, recognize that almost everything in your life is a choice.  This may not feel like the case, but it nearly always is.  It’s empowering to recognize how much of your daily life you choose; the simple act of acknowledging your choices can help shift your perspective.  For example, you choose to get out of bed each day.  You choose to get dressed.  You choose to do the laundry.  To go to work, if you’re employed.  To play with your child.  To buy groceries and make food.

Perhaps you’re thinking, “But I have to do all of these things.”  No, actually you don’t.  There may be some really unpleasant consequences if you choose NOT to do many of them, but no one is physically forcing these things on you.  You could refuse to get out of bed.  You could ignore the laundry.  You could stay in your pajamas all day.  You could call in sick.  You could let your child watch TV for 10 hours straight.  And so forth.  Are these good ideas?  Probably not.  But they’re still options, and the choice to go about your day doing all your regular duties is just that – a choice.

Second, look at what is within your control.  Whether at home or at work, what small adjustments could you make to improve your situation in some small way?  Earlier articles have talked about fun – how could you build a little more fun into your day?  What small changes could you make to brighten up your environment?  Could you add some color, play music, buy a plant, rearrange something?  Even little things can make you feel better about where you are and what you’re doing.

Then, think ahead in time – maybe a few months, maybe a few years – to a point where you can envision your situation being different.  Maybe your options are more limited right now than you would like, but realizing that there is – somewhere – a light at the end of the tunnel, can help alter your perspective.

Although none of these steps will greatly alter your circumstances, sometimes just looking at a situation in a different way can make it seem more tolerable, and keep it from making you as unhappy.