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Our children get messages everywhere – from their friends, the media, society in general – but no messages are more important than the ones they get from you.
What messages do your words send to your children? Direct messages are obvious, whether positive (“I love you,” or “You’re such a nice boy”) or negative (“You never listen!” or “You always make a mess!”). Children are also keenly aware of what you say about them to others, so these messages are important to be aware of, too. Without realizing it, this is how many moms reinforce either positive or negative messages; if your son hears you say, “Jack doesn’t play very well in groups,” he may accept this as truth, and further live up to the expectation.
Equally significant are your unspoken messages. When words aren’t involved, kids may not consciously be aware of the information received,...
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