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I have this flip-flop behavior to be true of both teenage boys and girls in my classroom. And I'm surprised that this is happening so early for you and your son. When I taught 8th grade, what you described was totally true of the girls, but not so much the boys. This year teaching my 10th graders, my boys were totally unpredictable: one day so cool and fun, next day throwing their backpack and yelling "F U b-word!" It took me totally by surprise and it was rather upsetting. Girls have mood swings, but they are typically more obvious about it; they come storming in and it's like "Uh-oh." Boys are land mines.
While I don't have a teenager yet, I can sympathize with you. My only suggestion is that you enjoy the good days and power through the bad. I have found that the same strategies I use with my toddler work wonders with my teenagers: I don't react to bad behavior, I make sure the environment is safe when they throw a tantrum, and I reward good behavior.
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