http://www.sacmomsclub.com/home/Blog/creatress/10151 I was recently reading someone describing a father in delivery as “feeding you ice chips, wiping your brow, cradling your newborn tenderly as you rested.” Now, before I delve into this, let me just add that my husband is wonderful, I love him dearly and he’s a great dad… However…   This is not what happened when my son was born. There were no ice chips being fed, no brow wiping, and no cradling (done by him once the crying started.) He was freaked out and like a dear in headlights. He was overwhelmed and I think shut down on me a little. Sure, he tried his best (heck, he even cut the cord!), but unless I was barking an order at him he just stood there with a look of terror on his face. I’m honestly shocked he ever wanted to have sex again after seeing that look go on for hours.   The magic moment I would have to say really came around midnight. I had been up for the last two days giving birth to his son (yes, two days) and said son was now wailing louder than I thought possible for a newborn. My husband? Oh, he was playing “Sleeping Beauty” on the sofa sleeper in my hospital room. You’d think it was nothing more than the sound of the air conditioner kicking on. My yells to him from across the room went un-noticed as well. Not wanting to physically get up (for obvious reasons), and not knowing what else to do, I took the little hat off my newborn sons head and whipped it at my husbands face with deadly accuracy. Finally! Something that worked! He woke up long enough to share the loving words that he was tired and what did I want? Huh!? What!? “Ummm… I WANT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR SON WHILE I REST!!” Or something to that affect was screamed at him.   In the end, I called in the nurse, told her he wouldn’t stop crying and that I thought something “was wrong.” She snuck him away (I’d bet a million dollars gave him a bottle, even though I was nursing and wanted none of that), and brought him back to me sound asleep with a pacifier stuck in his mouth. She was an angel and I wouldn’t have cared if she gave him a bottle full of rum at that point in the game.   My point is, that even the BEST dads can get off to a rocky start. Those early days were really tough. I do think it’s different for moms. You’ve had all that time with your baby inside you, and mother nature helps you out in the beginning with some hormonal direction. Dads? They’re a little lost in the shuffle and just doing their best.   Now my husband and I can laugh about this story. At the time, I really wasn’t so sure what I’d gotten myself into. Parenthood has been a wild, unpredictable ride. One that really has no ending (like I once thought.) I’m thrilled however to be on it next to my man. Baby hat bruise and all!     I was recently reading someone describing a father in delivery as “feeding you ice chips, wiping your brow, cradling your newborn tenderly as you rested.” Now, before I delve into this, let me just add that my husband is wonderful, I love him dearly and he’s a great dad… However…   This is not what happened when my son was born. There were no ice chips being fed, no brow wiping, and no cradling (done by him once the crying started.) He was freaked out and like a dear in headlights. He was overwhelmed and I think shut down on me a little. Sure, he tried his best (heck, he even cut the cord!), but unless I was barking an order at him he just stood there with a look of terror on his face. I’m honestly shocked he ever wanted to have sex again after seeing that look go on for hours.   The magic moment I would have to say really came around midnight. I had been up for the last two days giving birth to his son (yes, two days) and said son was now wailing louder than I thought possible for a newborn. My husband? Oh, he was playing “Sleeping Beauty” on the sofa sleeper in my hospital room. You’d think it was nothing more than the sound of the air conditioner kicking on. My yells to him from across the room went un-noticed as well. Not wanting to physically get up (for obvious reasons), and not knowing what else to do, I took the little hat off my newborn sons head and whipped it at my husbands face with deadly accuracy. Finally! Something that worked! He woke up long enough to share the loving words that he was tired and what did I want? Huh!? What!? “Ummm… I WANT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR SON WHILE I REST!!” Or something to that affect was screamed at him.   In the end, I called in the nurse, told her he wouldn’t stop crying and that I thought something “was wrong.” She snuck him away (I’d bet a million dollars gave him a bottle, even though I was nursing and wanted none of that), and brought him back to me sound asleep with a pacifier stuck in his mouth. She was an angel and I wouldn’t have cared if she gave him a bottle full of rum at that point in the game.   My point is, that even the BEST dads can get off to a rocky start. Those early days were really tough. I do think it’s different for moms. You’ve had all that time with your baby inside you, and mother nature helps you out in the beginning with some hormonal direction. Dads? They’re a little lost in the shuffle and just doing their best.   Now my husband and I can laugh about this story. At the time, I really wasn’t so sure what I’d gotten myself into. Parenthood has been a wild, unpredictable ride. One that really has no ending (like I once thought.) I’m thrilled however to be on it next to my man. Baby hat bruise and all!     en-us Thank you for speaking so frankly about his "deer in the headlight" moments!  I totally have a vivid picture in my mind of you two at the hospital there :) My husband was so sweet, but had NO clue and was absolutely freaked out!  And by the time the baby was born he could barely keep his eyes open because he had been so much coffee in last 24hours.  He got to sleep while I had to tend to every cry & need of the baby!  I think I was the one that should've been sleeping. Anyways, Happy Father's Day to your honey! http://www.sacmomsclub.com/home/Blog/creatress/10151/#c_84596 http://www.sacmomsclub.com/home/Blog/creatress/10151/#c_84596 Thank you for speaking so frankly about his "deer in the headlight" moments!  I totally have a vivid picture in my mind of you two at the hospital there :) My husband was so sweet, but had NO clue and was absolutely freaked out!  And by the time the baby was born he could barely keep his eyes open because he had been so much coffee in last 24hours.  He got to sleep while I had to tend to every cry & need of the baby!  I think I was the one that should've been sleeping. Anyways, Happy Father's Day to your honey! Thanks for sharing that our new dad wasn't the only one who zonked out while us exhaused marathon runners took care of the baby. Can you imagine it being the other way around? I think my husband would be traumatized for years. Happy Fathers Day to our little Sleeping Beauties (and I don't mean the babies!) http://www.sacmomsclub.com/home/Blog/creatress/10151/#c_84597 http://www.sacmomsclub.com/home/Blog/creatress/10151/#c_84597 Thanks for sharing that our new dad wasn't the only one who zonked out while us exhaused marathon runners took care of the baby. Can you imagine it being the other way around? I think my husband would be traumatized for years. Happy Fathers Day to our little Sleeping Beauties (and I don't mean the babies!)