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I usually cut my sons hair.  He is almost three and he hates it, or so I thought.  When I do it he practically hyperventilates, and cries so hard he can't calm down.  Well I am happy to say I am never doing it myself again!  I found Jillybean Salon for kids.  Its on Harding and its wonderful.  I went first thing Saturday morning because I thought no one else would be there, I was afraid of his reaction. 

He sat in a firetruck, and watched Baby Einsteins on the TV (which are two of his favorite things).  He still fought the haircut, but nothing like he does with me.  Donna was so great, she helped me back off a bit so that he could accomplish this on his own, and I am so proud of him.   I thought I would have to hold him down, but the less I held him the better he did. He did have a major meltdown... when we went to leave.  He did not want to leave, he wanted to stay and play with the toys.   I recommend this place to everyone.  (I don't work there!) 

My husband and I went to church this Sunday for the first time being married.  We wanted our 3 year old to go to the Sunday school there to get an idea of what preschool would be like, and we wanted to see if we liked the church.  My 3 year old had a blast, a friend of mine was in the classroom with him, and she said he loved it.   We liked the church overall, the songs, the preacher was funny, and it had a warm feeling to it.  However it left my husband and I a little conflicted about our beliefs.

We both agree there is a God, and that a higher power does exist.  But some of the things that the preacher talked about didn't make sense to us.  Can we believe in God and Jesus, but not agree with some of the things in the Bible?  Can you call yourself a Christian and still believe in Evolution? He talked about prayer, and he referenced to a part in the Bible that said since God couldn't find one person in some land to pray, he destroyed the land.  In the book of Jobe he said that Satan could do anything he wanted to this man, but the only thing he couldn't do was to take his life.  It was to prove to Satan that no matter what you did to him his belief in God would remain.  Now our first thoughts were, wow that is a pretty harsh thing for God to do.  He is destroying a land, letting Satan torture a man, and from what the preacher said he had boils from head to toe.  Should I believe in a God that would do this? He also said that if you don't pray then God basically wants nothing to do with you.  He also said that God should be your number one priority in life, and that he is responsible for all good and bad that happens.  Now I could be misinterpreting all of this, but my husband and I took it the same way.  When he told us about all the things that God does for us in our lives I thought to myself, no my husband and children do that for me.  I related everything back to them.  They are my number one priority.

I want to believe in Jesus and be religious.  I want to attend a church that says its okay to disagree with some of the things in the Bible.  Some of the things in there just don't make sense to me.I don't want a church to tell me what to believe, I want them to support me in what I already believe, and to not try to change me. 

There have been too many things that have happened in my life to make me think, someone is really watching over me.  I don't know how I survived some things unless there is a God and he protected me.  But there are so many questions, and it seems that its either 100% believe or don't believe at all.  I quit going to church a long time ago for this very reason.  Every church I go to tells me that I have to believe 100%.  I am not sure I can.  Does that make me an atheist? 

I am so confused, and I don't know where I stand.  So many of my friends are Christians and they believe with all their hearts, I wish I could, because then I wouldn't have this conflicted feeling inside me.  

Wow I really sound desperate, I'm not.  I'm fine.  My whole life I have had these questions, and this weekend just brought them all back into my mind.  All I can say is that I pray for my family and friends to stay safe and healthy every day because that is what means the most in my life.   I hate to say it but without God in my life I still have my family, but without my family I would have nothing.