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Back when my son was three I really wanted another baby. REALLY REALLY wanted another one. My husband however did not. After much discussion, we came to a compromise. It takes six months for a vasectomy to become affective. I would have those six months to get pregnant, or not. If not, that would be it. No more talk of babies. It didn’t happen and I was pretty sad about it at the time. I had been hanging onto all the expensive baby things just in case (stroller, portable crib, changing table, etc…). After the six months when it was obvious we would have an only child, I gathered them all together, took a picture and sent them off to a consignment shop.

I can’t tell you how glad I was to take that photo. There was some sense of closure about it that I really needed. All the symbols of baby-hood altogether to say “good bye.”

Fast forward eleven years. I was laying in bed last night thinking of our son. How he is now 100% a teenager. He isn’t very much like the little boy I used to have at all. I still dream about that little boy. In an odd way I feel like he’s gone. He’s gone and has been replaced by this young man who I struggle every day to get to know. This guy who is very different from my little boy.

I feel like it’s a big change. Bigger than most people realize when your child enters that time of life. They are like newborns all over again. But newborns who don’t want parenting (but need it just as much). All raw nerves and hormones. Everything is too loud, too strong, too much. They have new energy, interests, social groups, work to do and things to learn. It’s a drastic change that quite literally (at least for us) happened overnight.

I miss my little boy. I also am excited for my little-man. Like any relationship, I work hard to get to know him. What does he like? Not like? Eat? Enjoy? Stress about? Want in life? Think about? Since these change daily, I constantly try to talk to him. Luckily he enjoys talking with me (for now), I feel pretty up-to-date. It is an odd feeling however. Like my boy has been replaced. I feel a need to mourn that little one, just like I did the baby items that would never see another baby.

I am very proud of my son and feel he is blossoming into a wonderful guy. I’m also proud of the job his father and I are doing raising him. When I look back, I’m glad we didn’t have another child. At the time we didn’t realize our son was on the Autism Spectrum and I know our son would have missed out on a lot of vital attention, money and therapy if we had a second child. But the heart isn’t always logical. The same goes for this time in our lives. My heart mourns the passage of his little childhood, even though I’m proud and pleased to see him transition into young adult.

A week or so ago I did a blog about working for yourself. Being a "momtrepeneur." I thought about this blog because I get a lot of questions from other moms wanting to know how to get started. As I said in the other blog, it isn't easy to get started on your own. It's good to get help and advice.

I recently met another mom from this site for coffee who is trying hard to do just that. She has a great business concept and some inventory already created, but didn't know where to go from there. Here's what I told her...

#1) Figure out what your starting product will be. Jewelry is hard to sell as there are SO many people who do it. Vintage and recycled are always in (especially now), so that's a good angle.

#2) Choose a business name. Don't get so specific that you're locked into making that one item forever (like Janes Necklaces).

#3) Get a website. I like Blogspot. They're free and very easy to use. You can also easily convert pictures and text to HTML to copy and paste onto other sites (like MySpace) if you aren't good at HTML. Did I mention they're free? http://www.blogger.com/home

#4) Get a digital camera if you don't already have one. If you do have one, practice practice practice!!! A photo of your items is worth $1,000 (not a thousand words).

#5) If you are making your items (which I'm assuming you are for the sake of this blog), get an Etsy store. Etsy is like Ebay for handmade items. You get your own "store" for free. It is 20cents per item you list, but it stays in your store for up to 4months and includes up to 5pictures of the 1 listing. You can't beat it! Link up with PayPal and you have the cheapest website in town. My sister-in-law dumped her expensive personalized website to switch to Etsy and is making a lot more profit because of that move. http://www.etsy.com/

#6) Get business cards and start handing them out to everyone you know. I LOVE Overnight Prints.com http://www.overnightprints..... For $9.99 you can get great quality thick paper stock cards (that you design using their very simple on-line tools) delivered right to your home. Do I sound like a commercial yet? See why you need to know how to take a good product picture? Use it on your card!

#7) Tell everyone. Send e-mails with links to your store. Pass out cards. Be your own model and wear your product. When someone compliments you or comments, hand them a card!

#8) Craft Show or Shop? There are 2 major ways to now sell your product. Craft shows, or shops. Shops will take a 30% standard cut from your price. So you'll need to price higher than you would in-person, or make less. Shows usually have a table fee of $20-$60 for a 6foot space. You'll need your own table, chair and display items. I suggest the Dollar Tree for the last necessity. When you're first starting out, don't pay more than $20. Make sure you have plenty of change and everything priced and ready to go.

Second Saturday in Downtown Sacramento is a great place to start doing craft shows. http://www.sacramento-secon... Many art galleries and coffee shops will encourage vendors to come down and set up a table for the $20 fee. Try and hook up with stores or other vendors who are doing similar items you are. Like jewelry, vintage, clothing, etc.

#9) Seek advice from others! I've only been doing this since June and have had a TON of help from the pros along the way. Search the web for help and advice. Check out other people's work, but don't get discouraged. If you're having fun and your initial cost is low... it's worth it!!!

#10) Keep your expectations realistic, or you'll get discouraged. Expect to "break even" for a while, especially at shows. That way if you do great, it'll be a surprise. It took months before I even made one sale on my Etsy store.

Hope this is helpful!

:)

There’s a new term out in the world these days; Momtrepeneur. It’s a fast growing movement of mothers who –gasp- want it all. To be there for their kids and contribute to the family coffers at the same time. We women were born to multi-task!

I have been a momtrepeneur since my son was born. Back in those days I made “Mommy & Me” nursing bibs. They were long, breathable, beautiful pieces of fabric with a velcro strap that would go around mom’s neck. They even had pockets for holding pacifiers and other necessities. If there’s one thing mom’s need, it’s extra hands. This allowed moms to comfortably nurse their child away from public eyes no matter where they were. I made and packaged them at home and sold them to other moms in my parent group.

I then went on to do calligraphy for people. Invitations and cards. From there I decided to get back into painting (and my son was in school by then), so I opened Creatress Designs, the home mural business. I had a blast doing custom creation murals in peoples homes. My first client was my son’s Kindgarten teacher! My business was going very well when we decided to move back to the Sacramento area and bought a home in Davis. I quickly got a client in Woodland who wanted me to paint every room in his house. It was bliss. Just as I was finishing up however, I had a bad accident where my ACL (the muscle that keeps your knee on) tore and my knee ripped to the back of my leg. After that, it was no more ladders for me. Luckily I have some very creative friends, so a girlfriend did the ladder work, while I did the low work. That was the last mural I did.

After that I turned my attention to teaching. I love giving back to my community and art. After enrolling my son in some local art classes for children and finding them to be shockingly lacking (either taught by good teachers, but bad artists. Or good artists, but terrible teachers). I decided to “throw my hat into the ring” and give teaching art a try. Turns out, I really enjoyed it.

After two years of coming up with my own curriculum and repeatedly teaching the same cartooning class over and over for the city, I was feeling a little burnt out. So, I decided foolishly that my son was old enough now and I needed to “get my head out of the clouds” and get a “real job.” I hid out in the corporate world for a year and a half. It was a year and a half too long. I left the corporate world battered and bruised and questioning my next move (but knowing I was finished with “office” work).

Luckily for me I have a very understanding husband who always supports me no matter what. He was very understanding during this time.

Let me side-line here by saying that I am a jewelry FREAK. I don’t like jewelry, I LOVE jewelry. Love it! My love for jewelry rivals Elizabeth Taylor herself. I have been making jewelry since I was a little girl. I loved giving my creations as gifts. Friends and family would rave and tell me they get compliments all the time on my pieces.

During this very stressful time, I started making some jewelry. More for a hobby than with any business thoughts. The more I made however, the more I liked it and could see myself doing this full-time. I had very much enjoyed my muraling business and working for myself. I also love the freedom and flexibility that working for myself gives me. I’m also somewhat controlling and… well… when it’s your own business, that’s not a problem!

I really didn’t know how to start. I made about 25 pieces and then took them around to shops in Davis, talking to the store buyers. Even the best shop will want to do a split with you. Usually 30% them and 70% you. That’s the best deal you can expect to get. Since the cost of my original pieces were so high to make (and took a long time), I wasn’t happy with the deal. I tried other various ways to sell my jewelry, but nothing was working for me. It was at this time that I decided to get some advice. I needed to find other people in the same situation as myself and band together. A quick search on MySpace uncovered a local group of women art and craft based business owners called the Sacramento Craft Mafia. The Craft Mafia I learned is a national organization for women business owners whose specialty is hand-made items. I was thrilled to learn that the Sacramento chapter had just started and was open to new members (it has since frozen new membership till the end of January due to such high membership numbers). I attended my first meeting and was welcomed with open arms. I learned so much that night and every day since. I have done a craft show in Downtown Sacramento every month since joining, most with other ladies from the group, and am loving the adventure of being a momtrepeneur.

I learned about Etsy (my Etsy shop)from my group and how to open up my own shop. I learned about pricing, inventory, what shops were looking for people and what to make. I switched my line from beading (which a ton of people do) to vintage resin casting. I found a good nitch and am making good money at it. My supply cost is low, my time is valuable and they are fast to make. The demand is high and I’m doing well at craft shows.

So, if you are thinking of becoming a momtrepeneur, I have some advice for you. Don’t do it alone. Make some friends, get involved in a group (or start your own). Meet with other business owners (especially those who do similar work to what you want to do) and listen to their advice. It takes a village to raise a momtrepeneur!

(I also love to give advice and am happy to dish it out here anytime. NEXT BLOG: My meeting with a local budding momterepeneur!)