HomeI'm Just Saying...
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I Need to Be Alone!
Don't get me wrong, I love my husband and kids...but I also miss the days of living alone and not having to take care of any other living, breathing human being other than myself. I used to hate to be alone, or maybe I just never really got the chance after leaving home (2 parents, 2 siblings) and moving in with roommates for college and a few years after. When I bought a house on my own when I was 26, my first thought was "This sucks...there's no one around!" After a few months, though, I grew to LOOOVE being alone. That lasted for about 2 years until I met my husband and within 6 months I had moved in to his house...he traveled a lot for work, so I still had a lot of alone time. Fast forward 9 years to parenthood with two almost-7-year-old twins. I'm never alone! I often tell my husband that I feel like the "brain" of the family...keeping track of what's going on a school, making sure they have lunch money, clothes to wear, food to eat. My husband helps a lot around the house, but for a number of reasons, his forte is not keeping track of things. So you can imagine my elation when my husband told be today he was taking the kids to see his family over the long 3-day weekend next week. ROCK ON! I get to be by myself for 3 WHOLE DAYS!!! I can clean the house and have it stay that way....I can sleep in the middle of my bed! I can do whatever the heck I want!! I have all these grand visions of doing a mini home makeover and catching up on all the projects I want to do around the house, but realistically, I'll probably get a good book or movie and veg on the couch for at least one day....I hope it rains!! Is it bad that I'm so excited?! 4 comments from 4 users
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posted by
creatress
on Feb 7, 2008 at 11:38 AM
posted by
MissVicki
on Feb 7, 2008 at 01:30 PM
I think that's great you get 3 days to yourself, of course you should be excited, and celebrating! Enjoy it!!! And I agree, even though my husband helps alot with things, I have to do most of the thinking, planning, and organizing or things would never get done :-)
posted by
hmoeckli
on Feb 7, 2008 at 06:49 PM
A student of mine started singing, "All by myself...don't want to be all by myself" and I thought to myself that I cannot remember the last time I had some time to myself. 20 minutes here or there in my classroom, but that's about it. I'd love 3 days!Have a great time! posted by
RoonieCav
on Feb 8, 2008 at 03:37 PM
I know what you mean about being the "family brain" but when we tried to sort out the chores or divide the responsibliites, it was too hard for two persons to do it. We had scheduling conflicts, one person thought the other one took over but in reality it never got done because it fell in two categories (paying the bills being both the business and a family chore. He did the business things and I did family scheduling and general budgeting). Just think of all the spiders that you don't want to kill, throwing away the dead bird that the cat left on the back porch and the many other things that you would hate to do. It's okay to be the family brain if there is a balance of other things that he does. Also, there is nothing wrong with your fantasies changing from a secret meeting with the guy at the gym to being all by yourself with a book and popcorn for dinner. As you get older, your fantasies will change again to going back in time and spending time with your siblings or parents who now have alzheimers disease. Â
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Hey Girl!
NOOOOOO!!! It isn't bad at all. It's 100% normal. Without my son going to school and my husband going to work (aka: alone time), I'd loose it big time. Everyone needs that alone time. It makes you an even better mother and wife.
"I often tell my husband that I feel like the "brain" of the family...keeping track of what's going on a school, making sure they have lunch money, clothes to wear, food to eat."
Oh man, does that sound familiar. I was telling my aunt the other day that being a day/husband is alot like velcro. You zip off and you're 100% at work, you zip off work and you're 100% at home. Being a mom/wife is like being a tree. Your roots go so deep there is no way to cut off and be really alone, or at work, or with friends. There's always something to consider, have in the back of our mind, remind someone of, to do... you get the jist. Women just have to think of everything and do it all or it won't get done (at least that's how I feel). So no, you're not alone.