SacMomsClub.com

My mom, whom i miss dearly,  gave me this in March 6 years ago. I just came across it and thought i'd share with you ladies. It's even funnier now, because when i read it the first time, I only had one child. Now after the second one, its hilarious! Hope you enjoy.

The Evolution of Mothers

Being a parent changes everything. But being a parent also changes with each baby. Here are some of the ways having a second and third child is different from having your first.

Your Clothes

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your ob/gyn confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby: You wear you regular clothes as long as possible.

3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

Preparing for the Birth

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.

2nd baby: You don't bother pacticing because you remember that last time breathing didn't do a thing.

3rd baby: You ask for an epiduaral your 3rd month.

The Layette

1st baby: You pre-wash your newborn's clothes, color coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.

2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.

3rd baby: Boys can wear pink can't they?

Worries

1st baby: At the first sign of distress-a whimper, a frown-you pick up the baby.

2nd baby: You pick up the baby when her wails threaten to wake your first born.

3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Pacifier

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash it and boil it.

2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.

3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

Diapering

1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.

2nd baby: You change their diaper every 2 to 3 hours, if needed.

3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.

Activitiesy

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.

2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.

3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times.

2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.

3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home

1st baby: You spent a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.

2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn't sqeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.

3rd baby: You spend a bit of every day hiding from the children.